Us Score? You Gotta Be Kidd(y)ing Me!

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 579

SUTTON UNITED – 0
KIDDERMINSTER HARRIERS – 3   [Barnett 10, Marsh 31, Hadley 83]

Well, lets face it, are the U’s actually going to manage just ONE more goal for us long suffering fans this season or are they just gonna bale out on the season and leave us waiting all over the summer for the next chance to celebrate a U’s strike?

Ross Is Back. Sadly.

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 601

SUTTON UNITED – 0          
DOVER ATHLETIC – 1   [OG 59]

Let me explain. You may remember from the K’s Away report my little tirade about the official that day. Mr Joe Ross of Chingford.

Shut That Fat Biffer Up

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 805

NORTHWICH VICTORIA – 2    [Cooke 50, Owen 67]
SUTTON UNITED – 0

Well, that’s it folks. We’re back in the Ryman. Official.

They Only Need 10 Men

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 1548

STEVENAGE BOROUGH – 1   [Pearson 86]
SUTTON UNITED – 0

Another game, another defeat. Well, you didn't expect anything else did you?? We certainly didn’t.

Ryman Return Ever Closer

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 659

SUTTON UNITED – 0
MORCAMBE – 1  [Norman 66]

Story of our season really. A poor, narrow defeat in a game where we could easily have taken something and all our relegation rivals winning.

The Aftermath

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 460

SUTTON UNITED – 1   [Hutchinson 70]
SCARBOROUGH – 2   [Rennison 22, Brodie 39]

Match Reporter: Chalmers

Not many people were stupid enough to turn up for the aftermath of the Kingston debacle. (See, I wasn't so bloody stupid after all! - Taz).

Forest ‘Green’ After This One

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 604

SUTTON UNITED – 3  [Hutchinson 38, Watson 36,81]
FOREST GREEN ROVERS – 2   [Bennett 27, Hunt 75]

They had to go and win it didn't they? Bastards.

Down & Out At The Bucks Head

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 1011

TELFORD UNITED – 2   [Martindale 34p, 69]
SUTTON UNITED – 0

Well, where do you start? At the beginning I s’pose. Sutton United all but surrendered their Nationwide Conference status at Telford’s Bucks Head ground on Saturday, turning in quite possibly one of the most toothless performances I can remember for some time. 

Relegation 6-Pointer No 39 In A Series of 42

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 985

SUTTON UNITED – 1   [Forrester 78]
WOKING – 1   [Steele 85]

Blah blah blah relegation 6 pointer blah blah blah must win blah blah blah didn't. Well you know the story by now. As the title says, we congregated at GGL for yet another game we had to win to keep alive our chances of actually retaining our Conference status next season. If it wasn't for the likes of Sheffield Wednesday, Watford etc we’d have a good chance of getting in the Guinness Book of Records under “Greatest Number of Relegation 6 pointers played in a single season”

Dealing (with) The Cards

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 2100

WOKING – 1  [Akrour 49]
SUTTON UNITED – 2   [Winston (Pen)51, Watson 53]

So, to our umpteenth relegation six-pointer of the season. But with a twist this time. Spoiler alert: We won this one!!  A decent performance from the U’s (at last!) got its just reward with an much needed and vital win. It was also the first time we’d met our ex-fave, Nassim Akrour, since his disappointing summer move to Kingfield. Naturally, the French wizard scored. But more of that later.

Rushden University of Football. Third & Final Lesson

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 2749

RUSHDEN & DIAMONDS – 4  [Butterworth 5, Burgess 39, Peters 51, Lowe 83]
SUTTON UNITED – 0

Well, that’s more like it eh? Just 4 days after dumping ol’ Rushden out of the FA Trophy on their own patch, we return to eek out our now familiar 90 minute long 3-points-surrendering ceremony.

We’re Grim Oop North

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 889

ALTRINCHAM – 3   [Timmons 46, Ellison 49, Russell 83]
SUTTON UNITED – 0

Match Reporter: Chalmers

Unfortunately, due to the other half’s birthday, ‘Ol Taz was unable to attend Sutton’s umpteenth relegation six pointer of this campaign. So, for the first time since October, Match report duties fell to fellow drunkard, Mr Chalmers. Here is his story.

Oh We Don’t Like To Be Beside The Seaside

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE 
Att: 1395

SCARBOROUGH – 3    [Tate 10,90 McNiven 42]
SUTTON UNITED – 0

The longest trip available to us in the Conference and we just had this feeling that like many others, it would produce sod all reward for our presently Ryman bound heroes.

Ross The Boss

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 1527

KINGSTONAIN – 4  [Wingfield 5, 87 Crossley 47, Leworthy 85]
SUTTON UNITED – 2   [Winston 3, 30]

So another saturday afternoon and another defeat. This time though, we’re really in the shit.

A Lack Of Bite

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 850

SUTTON UNITED – 1     [Hutchinson 58]
SOUTHPORT – 1    [Pell 47]

OK, the honeymoons over. Let’s take the rose tinted specs off and start facing facts. We are staring relegation in the face. Simple.

Same Shit, Different Game

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 2818

KIDDERMINSTER HARRIERS – 1  [Fluked It 51]
SUTTON UNITED – 0    

So after the shit sandwich dished up by the U’s on Wednesday night, we were looking for a 1000% improvement to simply prevent a bloody good hiding at Nationwide Conference leaders, Kidderminster.

Bunch Of Tarts

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 2447

DONCASTER ROVERS – 1   [Kirkwood 23]
SUTTON UNITED – 0     

Sutton’s miserable recent form contiuned on Saturday with a disappointing 1-0 defeat at Doncaster’s Belle Vue ground.

This Is The Ball, This Is The Net

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 1014

HAYES - 1  [Charles 67]
SUTTON UNITED - 0

Yet again, Sutton United’s ability to completely ruin my Christmas has done it’s stuff. Another abject 1-0 away defeat to a frankly average side and we miss a shitload of chances.

Brummies Blag Points

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 749

SUTTON UNITED - 1   [Skelly 66]
NUNEATON BOROUGH - 2   [Ware 43, 84]

Our visit to Nuneaton earlier in the season had produced little for us. The local Firkin had closed permanently and after dominating the first 20 minutes, Dacky got himself sent off and we got beat.

Residents Only Parking!

NATIONWIDE CONFERENCE
Att: 586

FOREST GREEN ROVERS - 1   [Drysdale p24]
SUTTON UNITED - 2     [Watson 21, Newhouse 34]

Well, I don’t like to say it, but I bloody hate the part of the world that is commonly known as the ‘South West’. It’s a sodding nightmare.